Ria
Ria Doust
EDD 9th Jan 2023
Birth 21. Jan 2023
Baby Girl
Born at 11.41 am
Weight 6 pound 13 ounces (3.112kg)
Ria had a feeling about two separate dates that she felt her baby make her debut: The 17th of Jan or the 21st of Jan
Ria’s Birthday is on the 21st of Feb, and her son Miles's Birthday is on the 21st of March. Keeping with tradition, the 21st came to be the magic number.
Ria had experienced a traumatic labour and birth with their first baby, Miles. Miles’s birth left Ria and her husband Moses feeling very emotional and traumatised. Ria’s labour, amongst other things, included a cascade of interventions that ended with a cesarean section.
We don’t just leave our feelings about our birth at the hospital.
Your birth experience will impact your emotions, mind, body and spirit for the rest of your life.
With a lot of thought and reflection, both Ria and Moses were determined to make some changes around the model of care they would engage with this time. Ria and Moses recognised the importance of emotional and physical support. Ria was very educated on her birth options. Sadly, this wasn’t enough to save her from the personal trauma that unfolded.
For the birth of their daughter, Ria and Moses were looking for continuity of care. Engaging with the MGP program and hiring myself as their doula. This time Ria and Moses were going to feel safe in the knowledge that they were going to have a care team around them that genuinely cared about their birth experience. A team that will honour and support Ria’s birth wishes to achieve the birth her heart needs to heal. However, her birth unfolds.
Ria has had conversations with the medical team at the LGH discussing her birth preferences for labour. Birth is not a time when you should have to fight for anything. Hopefully, we are all on the same page this time.
“Mothers need to know that their care and their choices won’t be compromised by birth policies” - Jennifer Rosenburg.
Ria’s pregnancy lasts for 41 weeks and 5 days
“Let choice whisper in your ear, and love murmur in your heart. Be ready. Here comes life” – Maya Angelou
Ria, Moses, and Mile’s travelled in from Scottsdale on the 3rd of January to stay in Launceston until their baby was born.
Ria experienced prodromal labour in the lead-up to her birth. Days of not knowing if this was the real deal or still just her body preparing.
Patience is one of the first lessons our children teach us, even before they are born.
Ria’s baby had been in an optimal position, ready for birth, until the final week leading up to birth, she decided that she would turn posterior. This makes pregnancy not so comfortable for Ria.
We started ramping up the spinning babies techniques, labour preparation, acupressure and using the moxa stick to encourage her baby to turn. We did all we could to balance Ria's body and create space. The song by Bonnie Tyler, “turn around “, was constantly in Ria’s head.
A stretch and sweep in the days before labour kicked off revealed that there was a definite change. Things were happening. A day at the beach swimming with her girlfriend Rachel, laughing and washing away thoughts of “when will my baby be born” was good for Ria’s soul. There is an old wives’ tale; that if you dip your toes in the water at Mermaid’s Pool at Bridport, you will go into labour. Ria was up for anything at this stage, and in she went for a refreshing 30 min swim with Rachel.
“My first contraction will bring feelings of anticipation, excitement, and confidence in my body”-Unknown
20th Jan
I call around to see Ria late in the day, we do some more spinning babies, and Moses helps me out as we use the moxa stick to encourage their baby to turn into a more optimal position. Ria’s sensations are around 10-15 min apart. Ria has a plan, she is willing for her labour to kick off tonight, and she will call me at 5 am tomorrow. Then I will make my way to Ria, and we can put into practice all we have been working towards.
21st Jan
I am starting to think my birthing goddess is psychic, as planned. I receive a call around 5 am from Ria.
During the evening, around 9 pm, Ria's sensations had become stronger.
The frequency dropped back at midnight, but the intensity increased, and they felt forceful.
Ria wasn’t sure if she should call me that morning, as her sensations were strong but not that close together. Ria felt that her confidence needed extra support.
This is exactly the right time to call me.
When I arrive, I can feel Ria’s spirit lift; she can safely now fully surrender her mind and body to birthing her beautiful baby.
Encouraging words can have such a massive impact on making a woman feel more relaxed and at ease, helping to keep her focused and allowing tension and fear to be released and washed away.
Ria is having some back pain; we heat a heat pack for her back, keep the room in their bedroom dark and create a peaceful cocoon with fairy lights, music, and the diffuser to create a serene space for Ria to labour in.
Miles has gone for a sleepover with a friend for the weekend. All the stars are aligning perfectly.
Ria has started to lose her mucus plug, and she is experiencing a little bit of pressure in her bottom. At this stage, we still have an inkling their baby is in a posterior position.
It doesn’t take long once I am with Ria for her sensations to start to pick up in frequency and intensity; Moses and I emotionally and physically encourage and support Ria through each sensation. Each one brings her one step closer to meeting their daughter. Moses is a solid support for Ria, his hugs and words of encouragement are priceless. He knows how important this birth is to Ria. He also knows she doesn't need saving. In the coming hours, she will need love, reassurance, faith, and trust from all her care providers.
7 am
Ria is defiantly in established labour; we move to the kitchen for Ria to have a warm drink and some toast. Ria doesn't have much of an opportunity to eat or drink. I am performing double hip squeezes to help Ria through. Ria finds a lot of relief from the squeezes. Her labour is demanding her full attention. I call Ria’s midwife to update her on Ria’s progress. Ria also has an acupressure comb that is getting a good workout.
We are all excited about what this magical day will bring.
I am so proud of how well Ria is embracing all that her labour is asking of her. Ria has been preparing and waiting for this day; Ria knows this birth can transform her in many ways. My birthing goddess is embracing her power. You have got this, Ria.
We all move back to the warm and welcoming depths of the bedroom; Ria moves into the ensuite for a warm shower. In the safety of the shower, I can hear Ria making low and vibratory sounds; these wonderful tones are helping Ria to connect to her breath and follow her instincts.
Ria feels very heavy in her hips and her bottom, Ria's tummy is also hanging very low, and their baby is snuggling right down into her mummy's pelvis. Once out of the shower, I adorn her with more labour essential oils. She smells divine.
I truly believe that we should all pamper and make a woman feel like a birthing goddess when she is in labour. How amazing are our birthing bodies?
Honestly, we should be all bowing at her feet.
In giving birth to our babies, we may find that we give birth to new possibilities within ourselves." - Myla & Job Kabat-Zinn
8.30 am
We have moved back to the lounge room; Ria is leaning and breathing beautifully over the back of the couch. Ria remembers me saying that I do tend to stay at my clients’ homes until we need to go to the hospital if all is going well. Ria shares with me that she is feeling that she is ready to make her way to the LGH. I make the calls. The midwife at the LGH can hear Ria labouring in the background. We are welcome to come on in. I call back to request a room with a bath. I have a feeling we will meet this little girl before lunchtime today. I keep this to myself, as I don't happen to have a crystal ball on me.
8.52 am
The ride to the hospital is never easy. This one will be no different.
Walking up to the labour ward from the entrance is the last hurdle before Ria can settle into her new environment. Once in our room, I get to the business of recreating a calm and peaceful space for Ria.
Unfortunately, we are not given a room with a bath. Evidence supports water immersion for all births, including VBAC for healthy women and healthy babies. Hospital policies at the LGH are not aligning with us or the evidence today.
9.39 am
Ria’s sensations are about 1 min apart. When women are in labour, they frequently look for safe little nooks to labour in. Ria has herself nestled in a corner near the sink and tap, rocking through sensations.
Although her birth preferences are well known, she still must respond to the obstetrician's questions today and decline again continuous fetal monitoring and other standard hospital policies that she has declined previously in her one-minute breaks between contractions.
Ria’s beautiful midwife friend has already arrived too. Her energy is effervescent and kind. I can see she is excited to be here. Our birth team is complete.
10 am
Moses and I gently suggest that Ria may be more comfortable moving to a different space where her head isn’t so close to hitting objects like taps. I slip a mat under Ria’s feet and blow up the birth cub. Ria can stand leaning into the birth cub propped up on the bed. Ria is moving her body in response to what it needs, breathing and using low sounds that reflect how she is feeling. I continue with the double hip squeezes. Ria, at this time, asks for water injections for her back pain. Funny moment. I did mention that Ria is very well-versed in all aspects of birth. As the midwives measure up where they will be inserting the injections with a biro. Ria announces, "It doesn’t matter where you put them. “The midwives look up at her, a bit baffled, then back to make the spots on her back. The midwives hadn't been listening to the Birth Rebellion Podcast episode 20 on water injections with Nigel Lee. I have a little smile to myself.
“We must attempt to tell the whole truth about birth, the truth that includes the transformation mastery satisfaction, personal power and the difference between pain and suffering.”-Cheri Van Hoover
Ria finds a welcoming relief from the severe pains in her back. This will help Ria to keep moving her body. Her mind can fully focus solely on the other sensations now.
Our midwife thinks this little girl is still posterior. Ria is disappointed that she can’t use the bath for pain relief. As this had been cleared for her to use when she had a specific appointment with an obstetrician from the LGH weeks beforehand.
We need to move away from this now, as we have asked twice. We will focus on what we can control and not give any more energy to what we can’t. I use acupressure points to encourage their baby to turn.
10.21 am
It is amazing what can happen in 20 minutes. Our midwife feels that Ria's baby is on the move. "She is turning. "Ria has asked for a vaginal exam. Ria is relieved and feels elated to know she is 8cm dilated.
11.06 am
Ria is now in a little corner on the floor by the side of the bed, leaning over the birth cub. Ria has a lot of pressure in her bottom. I continue with the double hip squeezes and the acupressure point on her little toe. I miss a double squeeze while adjusting the pen on Ria's little toe. Ria can tell the difference when I am not doing them. Moses is reassuring Ria, wiping her down with cool cloths, and offering sips of hydralyte. We are all cozy together in Ria's small safe space. Our midwife and I try to share a space where I can perform the double hip squeezes, and she can angle her mirror holding it under Ria, to keep a watchful eye on where the magic is about to happen. Ria is focusing on connecting with her body in a way that will enable her to feel the fetal ejection reflex. Ria will not actively push; her body will do all the work without her straining or being directed to push. This is working well, and progress is slow but happening. I mention to Ria about creating some more space with a lunge. Ria doesn't think she can move from her all-fours position. I continue with hip squeezes and massaging her thighs and bottom to keep tension away.
11.15 am
Our midwife now suggests to Ria that a lunge may help her baby come down further. This time, with both of us voicing this option, Ria decides that she can dig deep and do it.
And just as we thought would happen, we started to see their baby. Ria's Surges are strong, but not stronger than our birthing goddess. Ria is tired but determined. Ria feels a spasm as the fetal ejection reflex goes into action.
“Just as a woman’s heart knows how to pump, her lungs to fill with air, and her hand to pull back from fire, so her body knows how to birth.”- Virginia Di Orio
Reaching down, Ria can feel her baby, encouraging Ria to breathe through the burning sensations. Allowing her baby’s head to be born slowly, resting until the next sensation. With love, sweat and tears, Ria again reaches down, and this time Ria sweeps her baby up into her arms. This moment in time is perfect. All that Ria had so passionately prepared for, dreamed of, hoped for and believed in came true.
Ria, multiple times had shared with me that she knew her body could do this. And with tears in my eyes, as I write this, I believe with all my heart that she could too.
We are all overwhelmed with joy. The emotion and the elation on Ria and Moses' faces tell us the whole story.
Love is in the air. We are all being swept up in an oxytocin wave.
11.41 am
Ria and Moses have welcomed the sweetest little bundle of joy into the world. Their baby girl is very alert. She takes us all in with her enchanting bright eyes full of wonder, so curious about her big new world.
After enjoying a precious golden hour with her new baby. This little girl has no problem latching on and enjoying her first breastfeed.
With this, Ria starts to feel intense labour pains. What is first thought to be after pain leads to a postpartum bleed. We are in the right place for Ria to receive the treatment she needs in her room to finally get her bleeding under control. This isn't before she makes perfect timing making it back to the bed after a shower is suggested to faint head first onto the bed. The shower will have to wait. During this time, Moses can enjoy some skin-to-skin with his baby daughter until Ria feels well enough to take her back into her arms.
"Birth is vast and multifaceted; radiant and mysterious. Birth contains multitudes, and through her, we birth our multitudes. We give birth to our hopes and our fears, to our ecstasies and our agonies, to our joy and our disappointments. We give birth to our babies, each one perfect and radiant. We give birth through our instincts, which will match us perfectly with our babies, who are and will always be instinctive creatures. May we all be blessed with instinctive birth."- Dr Sarah Buckley
Ria and Moses, thank you for trusting in me and inviting me to be part of your pregnancy and birth journey. It has been such a special and emotional experience for me to be part of your story. Welcome to the world ‘Lucy Mae ‘you have not only bought immense love but many healing gifts with your debut xxxx more than you will ever know xxxx